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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24310684">exhale and inhale</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/roscpctals/pseuds/roscpctals'>roscpctals</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Homestuck</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Coming Out, Father-Daughter Relationship, Gen, Lowercase, Other, POV First Person, Trans Female Character</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 03:35:41</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>476</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24310684</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/roscpctals/pseuds/roscpctals</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>a young boy is sat in his chair as his dad watches T.V at the side. or, more or less, reading a magazine.</p><p>john's been keeping something secret, and decides he doesn't want to be afraid anymore.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>None fuck off</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>31</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>exhale and inhale</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>'' i don't know if john is who i am, '' slipped out of my mouth.</p><p> </p><p>i shut up, wanting to stop speaking right at that moment.</p><p>but what had been said had been said,</p><p> </p><p>no turning back now.</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>my dad looked up at me from his magazine, it was probably a shitty one, more than usual. I never understood the appeal of those.</p><p> </p><p>i gulped, this has to happen now or never,</p><p>reluctantly i decided on the first option given.</p><p> </p><p>'' y- uh, you know how-- like. some, people are born with a body, that doesn't match with their brain? like, puzzle pieces that don't fit together. and you're missing the right one. ''</p><p> </p><p>the smoke from the pipe that was sat in my dads mouth formed to the front of his view, making it hard to tell if he was even paying attention,</p><p> </p><p>but i knew he was staring, listening.</p><p> </p><p>i breathed in and out,</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> calm down john- </em>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <em> john. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> no,  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> that wasn't me. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> not anymore. or maybe it never was. </em>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>i leaned back more into the wooden chair i was sat on, the food that had been placed in front of me surely long gone cold,</p><p> </p><p>'' how- '' i stuttered. <strike>i'm scared</strike>.</p><p> </p><p>i began tapping my fingers on the table, nails starting to hurt from how fast i was doing so,</p><p> </p><p>'' h-how, would you feel, if i was, uh, y'know. ''</p><p> </p><p>i exhaled,</p><p> </p><p>'' a girl? ''</p><p> </p><p>i couldn't inhale.</p><p> </p><p>i glanced back at my dad, watching for just a split second to see the reaction till i saw him stand up from the couch and looked away way too quick, </p><p> </p><p>which probably wasn't a good idea, it having made me feel dizzy.</p><p> </p><p>but,</p><p>with his blank look i could never tell how he felt, <em> and thats whats making me so scared</em>.</p><p> </p><p>he's now stood next to me.</p><p> </p><p>i closed my eyes shut.<br/><br/></p><p>i completely forgot about the breath i was holding when i felt long arms wrapping around me,</p><p> </p><p>gently.</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p><em>he wasn't angry</em>.</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>'' my daughter, i am so very proud of you '' dad said, me not having even noticed that he put away his pipe next to him at the table.</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>i choked up sobs to the point it <em> hurt </em> till i just couldn't keep them in anymore,</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>i didn't have to pretend to be someone i wasn't anymore.</p><p> </p><p>i didn't have to be <em> john</em>.</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>'' june. '' i impulsively said, more having been a realization of my own rather than being directed at my dad.</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>'' i'll always accept you, you're my june, and i'll always, always love you '' he said as his hand caressed my raven hair. </p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>i snorted up my snot as i cried and cried harder into his shoulder.</p><p>the oh-so heavy weights have been lifted off of my back and i could finally breathe again,</p><p> </p><p>i inhaled,</p><p> </p><p>i could be <em> <span class="u">june</span>. </em></p><p> </p><p>and she knew she was gonna be okay.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>hamstuck   ,  Anyways this site should have a june egbert tag</p><p> </p><p>my twitter is @heylittledove  !!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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